It is week 38 of the pregnancy; and I now officially understand why many women report feeling "ready" to go into labor. Prior to this time in my life, I wondered, "how could anyone be "ready" for intense pain?" Well, I guess the pain of labor is a price I am willing to pay to get this baby OUT of me and into my arms. However, as much as I am excited about seeing my toes again and walking without that weird late-pregnancy hip sway thing, I am the most excited about meeting our son! I can not wait to see what he looks like, touch his little fingers and toes, watch him sleep, and even hear him cry. (I will have to remember this in a few weeks at 3am). I am so amazed at how God has literally been knitting little Levi together inside of me - how far he has come in just 9 short months - and can't imagine going two more weeks without finally seeing him! What a miracle.
Of course this doesn't mean Dan and I are totally at ease with this whole situation. I mean, there is another person entering into our little family (whom, I might mention, we are solely responsible for) and it will definitely cause things to change! I could also write and write about all the things we could be worrying about right now....but that would be starting down a dangerous path. For now I have to remember that all parents are "new parents" at some point and make mistakes and, generally, learn as they go. For example, one of my greatest sources of comfort came from a scene on "Bethany Getting Married" (a show I am ashamed to recommend to anyone but secretly watch when it is on "E!"). Basically, in this reality show, there is a scene depicting Bethany and her husband bringing home their new baby....and they literally do not know how to get their baby out of the car. They struggle with the car seat base and finally have to call their nanny for help. As silly as this sounds, it just made me aware that, no matter how rich and famous someone is--no matter how savvy they are in business or how well educated they are etc -- babies are a mystery to be solved! My goal is not to try and be "super mom" - I am shooting for basically getting Levi to his first birthday with no major mishaps! And, hopefully, God will bless our parenting efforts and turn Levi into one heck of a little boy.
For now, we will keep waiting for Levi to make his appearance. We will keep preparing in the small ways we know how and keep praying that God works all things together for the good. My prayer is for a safe delivery and healthy baby; and also that we can get him out of the car when we get home!
It was refreshing and fulfilling to read your thoughts, Karen. We are so blessed to have you as our daughter-in-law! We too can't wait to meet our little Levi grandson. We made many mistakes in our parenting of your husband because we were imperfect, and as you know, we still are imperfect. Praise God that His strength is made perfect in our weakness. I still remember well the nights of waking up, feeling the pangs of anxiety about various struggles we were having in our young growing family, AND I remember how the Words of the Lord comforted my heart and returned me to sleep. He did and is still doing His work in our children despite our imperfections. You will know the joy of that too. We love you both (you three) so much. DuAnne
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